Mediation is an advisable option before going to court in a divorce. The mediator is a third-party neutral person, who helps two people come to an agreement about the divorce, and on matters related to the divorce, including child custody, parenting time, division of assets and alimony. Some Colorado divorces require a mediation, and try to come to an acceptable agreement with your spouse, before going to court.
However, it is important to make sure that you’re working with a mediator you can be comfortable with. Before you go ahead with mediation, do some background research on the mediator, and find out how many couples the mediator has worked with. Also, find out how many couples who used your mediator were able to settle their divorce out of the courtroom. If a large percentage of the couples went to court anyway, that doesn’t speak highly for the mediator’s abilities to help reach a settlement.
Speak to persons who have used the mediator in the past. That will give you better idea of the kind of person you will be dealing with. Find out if the mediator was creative, was able to foster an environment of trust and confidence, was patient, and was able to stick to the task of mediating even when things became ugly and confrontational.
Some men prefer to work with male mediators. If you feel much more comfortable discussing divorce-related issues with another man, look for a male mediator. Mediators are trained not to take sides, and just because your mediator is a male, doesn’t necessarily mean that he will see things from your point of view. Mediators typically choose no sides in any dispute.
You and your spouse should agree on the mediator. The importance of the mediator cannot be underestimated. This is a person who can have a significant role in what your life will look like post-divorce. Discuss with a mens divorce lawyer if mediation services are the right option for you.