There’s no denying that divorce is one of the most emotionally exhausting and traumatic times in an individual’s life. Conversely, it is also the one time in your life that you must absolutely keep your emotions on the back burner. In other words, it is dangerous for you to let your emotions come in the way of the many practical and sensible decisions that you will be required to make over the course of the divorce proceedings.
Holding onto negative emotions or feelings that you harbored for your spouse during the marriage can actually hinder your ability to move on with the divorce, and even your ability to move ahead with life after the divorce. Pondering time and over again on the vows that your spouse made and then broke, or promises that were never fulfilled, can simply block you mentally, and prevent you from taking the kind of bold and aggressive decisions that you may be called upon to take during the divorce.
If you hold on to the belief that the marriage should never have come to an end, you’ll find it very difficult to make the challenging alimony and child custody decisions that you will have to make to protect your rights, both as an individual and as a parent.
Psychologists suggest that you simply let go of the idea that your marriage was meant to last, or that it has another shot. It’s important to let go of the idea that you and your spouse can work at the marriage if you would just give it one more chance. Once you head towards divorce, it’s important not to turn back.
That doesn’t mean that you fill yourself with negative feelings towards your spouse. It merely means that you detach yourself from all the emotions that you’re feeling at that moment, and put them on the back burner to deal with at a happier time when the divorce proceedings are complete.